Wednesday, March 25, 2009


Sometimes I feel as though I let the G-Snack down.


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Sunday, March 15, 2009

My Kids Will Not Be Plastic Surgeons

Mothers dream. They always dream and wonder. Who am I carrying? -while pregnant. Who is this person? -while witnessing a tantrum. Maybe she's an architect? - while watching her build with blocks.
We've had lots of snow in Scotland this year. More than usual, and we have had the chance to build many snowmen/snowladies.
I do not wonder if my children will be plastic surgeons. After this winter, I KNOW DEEP IN MY BONES that they're not and should not and all should intervene if they even show a desire to become plastic surgeons. These snowmen are the result of arguing where hands go, lips, eyes, noses. My children showed a blatant disregard for all things human and descent. Mouths were on tummys, hands out of the cheeks, eyes on the other sides of heads. Bug would careen into our latest creation with a full body-slam as soon as my back was turned.

What I also know, is that I shouldn't have even bothered arguing in the snow. My little snowmutants are all melted and all I've got to show for it are pictures of snowmen that prove I won arguments with a 4 and 1 1/2 year old. Yay me. Though, with Bug and G that is no small feet if I do say so myself. Actually, I do have a wee bit of proof of the chaos in their minds...look back at the top picture. You can faintly see a stick coming out of its head and Bug still insists that's a hand, not a strand of hair.
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just some pictures...

Happy to Everyone and we miss you and we love you still and we love you when we come back and we love you to come visit and we love you to our visit right here in Scotland. You're writing lots of words. Uh, I'm so tired of you typing. You should go to bed Mama. Just leave the computer alone. as dictated to me by the Bug

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Saturday, March 14, 2009


I love my friends. I really love my friends and I find that I pick good ones or that good ones tolerate me...but that topic is for another post.

Two, in particular, cheer on the rebellious side of my children. I love it! I love it! It calms me down to have friends that have my back. As the main care-giver in my house, I've got to be the one laying consistent examples of "best practices." Eat broccoli before cookies. Go to bed. Brush your teeth. Don't wipe your nose on your favorite stuffed animal. If I wiggle too much with the best-practices, the kids get confused. They don't like it. We ate a kid friendly meal last night, PBJ sandwiches, Bug asked about an hour later if he could have a "real dinner." I said, "We had it. We had sandwiches. You liked it. You ate them all up and now they're in your tummy where dinner should be." He said, "No, I want a real dinner. I don't eat real dinners." A full on tantrum ensued, and, I was so tired, I actually tried to wrap my head around a way to reason with this last statement...Needless to say I slept well.

Back to my friends - These guys cheer G-Snak on when she's roaming the halls at 10:30pm. They feed vegan cake to Bug for breakfast. They chime in on poop jokes. I love it. Because these are "best practices," too, but ones that if I performed daily would just confound me and the kids...(note example above). I love that my friends root for the bits that show their character, that buck the rules. I love that my friends demonstrate to my kids their faith (and mine) that my kids will turn out all right, maybe even better, despite (because of?) the snot on their sleeves, lack of sleep, and sugar in their bellies.

My friends are such necessary parts of my family!!! Thanks guys!

Saturday, March 7, 2009


So, most of my readers contact directly, rather than post a question or comment. I've had lots of questions about that picture of G-Snak and the Bug. Yes, Bug has his head down a cannon that is still used to re-enact battles. That's why I've left G in a hurry to check it out. No, G only looks like I've left her to roll off the edge and plummet onto the rocky Scottish crags below.  There's a guard rail, but it doesn't stop the cold wind - which she hates. I mean, she really, really hates the cold.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

balance redux

I often feel torn. Torn between happiness that my children are growing up already and sadness they are growing up already. Torn between Bug and G-Snak. Take for example, today. I had to speak to Bug's teacher regarding care for his allergies during a school outing I can't attend. G was left to run around with the gang of toddlers all waiting to pick up their older siblings. I know this is normal, but I've never had a kid I could easily leave. Bug in the same position was too dangerous. What if a well-meaing mom gave a dairy-laden cracker to him, or even protein hydrolosate laden cracker, while I was away for the three minutes it takes to touch base without interrupting a class...well, it has happened and that's an ER visit and a prayer like none you've ever thought you could pray that all is okay. So, I'm torn. Does taking care of one mean exclusion of the other? I know in my heart that parenting should never be EVEN. EVEN is not FAIR. Fair parenting is being the parent each child needs. Fair parenting is being the parent that Bug needs - talking to his teacher. Fair parenting is being the parent that G-Snak needs - letting her run with the sweet gaggle of girls she so adores. Still, it's not something I've ever done and most likely will not do, letting Bug run free with a band of boys without my worry. It's just not me. It's not even, but it's fair - or at least life saving...
I also feel torn as to where home is. We're finding our way here and I wonder where home will be. I come up short in the maturity scale when M replies, "Home is where you and the kids are." I don't feel that way. I get attached to objects and the light coming through windows at 3pm in the winter and the smell of the earth with crocus budding through last year's fallen leaves. I don't think home is here in Scotland - at least if G-snak is deciding. She hates the cold.
I think she'll try to move to Hawaii with Auntie Mae and Mama T in her later years. Just a guess.
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Monday, March 2, 2009

G's photo choice

Some photos selected by the g-snack. T and myself riding wild chickens at Castle Brodick...
G and the Bug as rightful heirs to the Scottish Throne at Castle Stirling.
The Bug playing with the cannons.
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