I am a "yes mum" when Big M goes away. The children ask if they can eat ice lollies for lunch? Yes! Might they have a 3 hour visit to their favorite park? Yes! Would it be possible to watch PBS Kids/CBB's until their brains ooze out their ears and pool in a sticky glutinous mass on the floor? Yes! I adopt "low-impact-parenting" when Big M leaves because it makes his absence more enjoyable, especially since the kids have not caught on just yet and their requests haven't been death-defying. So, last week, the kids were quite lucky when we stumbled upon our adored and missed "Barbara's Puffins" brand of cereal. It is a naturally sweetened, whole grain cereal that is unheard of in the UK and it is our favorite. What's more, Barbara came out with a peanut butter and chocolate type during our sojourn abroad. The kids spied this and began to wiggle and moan the beginnings of their collective "please-mum dance." But they needn't complete it. Big M was out of town and I said YES! immediately.
Also, when Big M is away, the rule at our house is that if you would like to eat before I am done nursing T-Bird, then you must make it yourself. You gasp, but the kitchen is usually cleaner than if I try to juggle 3 kids' needs within a whiney 5 minute window. Plus, the children are single-minded without help. Food, as soon as possible. That's it. No fuss, few bowls and accessories... Ideal really. Though, I confess to leaving subliminal suggestions out the night before like cereal, apples, bowls, spoons - even bananas with pre-cut/easy peel stems sometimes.
The next morning, the kids were so excited for their peanut butter and chocolate puffins that they didn't even moan at me bedside and I didn't have to remind them of the "if you must eat right now, you must make it yourself" rule. They just woke, stumbled to the kitchen, and ate. It was a quick few minutes before Little M crawled into bed beside T-Bird and myself. I thought the cereal must have been quite a hit! Quick eats and he's even ready for a snooze! Amazing! "How was the cereal?" Little M nodded a yes and dozed off again next to T-Bird. I thought the cereal must be magical, beyond words! I went into the kitchen. Little M's bowl still had the chocolate puffs in it. Perhaps Little M wasn't feeling that well? Perhaps that was his reason for a speechless reply? His snooze? It most likely wasn't the cereal, I thought, as G didn't even carry it to the table she was that excited. She just sat on the floor, crunching away in that nascent awakening way. I bent down and sniffed her sleep-tousled head. Heaven. I peaked into her bowl. All of the chocolate puffs were still floating in the soy milk. She was only picking out the peanut butter ones with her spoon. I asked, "How is the cereal? Do you like the chocolate ones?" She whispered in that hesitant way that tells me she has an answer but doesn't want to be rude, "I don't know. The chocolate ones look like poop."
At first, I didn't go back to work due to Little M's anaphylaxis. But now that he is older and we have a safety routine that we both feel comfortable with, I haven't gone back to work due to our overseas status and also due to my belief that someone in their family should witness their growth. But, after reading the article that families with working mums do no long term damage to their children, our return to the USA and cereal that looks like poop, I think I might not have to witness everything...
http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2011/jul/22/working-mothers-no-harm-children
